My Superman!!

As soon as I opened my eyes this morning, I just started thanking God for my life and my blessings.  Lately, I have been doing a lot of that.  Life is so precious and often, I have taken it for granted.  The past few days have been rough.  The side effects started to hit me like clock work.  I was hoping that this time around it would be easier than the first session.  Well, it wasn't.  It was the same.  I got the mouth sores, no taste buds, headaches, diarrhea, extreme fatigue and body aches.  It started to hit me at the exact same time as last time.  Only this time I was prepared.  I was proactive and these side effects weren't getting me down this go around.  They may try physically, but emotionally, I wasn't going to let it happen.

This summer was spent differently than I would normally have spent it.  I missed a lot of fun and basketball games this year.  For the past 6 years, I have spent every summer traveling and attending basketball events.  It has felt weird to not go to the various events and support the kids I love.  All I have been able to do is just pray for them and pray that they all had a wonderful summer and that they got the looks from coaches that they needed.  To watch Andre this summer has been somewhat hard on me.  I know he loves me and wanted to be here to help me, as he has done.  Yet, I know he wanted to be at all the different tournaments this summer to hang out with his basketball family and friends.  In the past, we use to have these disagreements because I would get jealous that he spent so much time dealing with basketball and talking on the phone about basketball.  Typical wife complaints like: you don't spend enough time with me, basketball is more important than me, you talk to others about basketball more than me, you are more worried about basketball than me, etc.... I love how generous and kind he is and I KNEW he was only doing what his heart desired.  However, that jealous monkey would always creep in and make me feel like I was second to his basketball escapades.  How wrong was I?? So very wrong.  This summer has shown me how VERY important I am to him.  I should have known it but what can I say.  I am a wife and sometimes we do, we believe and we say stupid things.  My Breast Cancer made us miss so much...my nephew's Draft party, Las Vegas AAU national tournament, various NBA skill camps, multiple AAU tournaments, Adidas Nations camp, Nike Global, Las Vegas excursions, a close friend's daughter's wedding, a 70th birthday party for someone special, graduations parties, promotions/changes at work, and a lot of other things that I would normally do in the summer. Through all the things that we missed, Andre has continued to show me his love for me.  We both would have opted for no breast cancer this summer but we got it and we dealt with it together.  This is what marriage is all about.  When we made those vows in 1999 and said "for better, or worse, in sickness and in health," we meant it.  Andre has stood by me for better and now for worse..he is here in sickness and has always been here in health!  He has proven to me the blessing of our union.  Our marriage has had it's ups and downs but through it all, we have maintained a deep love for one another.  A love so deep that NOTHING can make it fail.  It is strong and it is secure.  We are bonded and this has made my journey so much easier.  It is funny. When I first met Andre, I fell in love at first sight.  From the first day, he has been my my rock, my hero, my Superman!  He really needs a cape with a big old "A" on it for Andre! :) I am thankful for so much these days.  However, I am most thankful for my husband and the man that he is.  Our children are so blessed to have him for Dad.  He has kept this house together when at times I thought it was going to crack.  He has held the kids together when their Mom was too weak and couldn't.  He has went to work, come home and cleaned, cooked dinner, mowed the lawn and then comfort me.  He has tried to stay involved in our extended kids lives this summer by calling them and encouraging them.  He is Uncle Dre to so many and I see from first hand how much he loves these kids and fights for their futures.  He is a plain old good man.  He is my Superman and I am so proud to say that!!

Tomorrow, Ron leaves and I am starting to get sad.  Having him here has been really nice.  But I know that he must return to his life in Florida and back to law school.  I just pray that he goes with a peaceful mind.  I don't want him to worry about me.  I will be fine.  Chemo makes it look like I won't but it is only a part of the process of healing.  The next time my son sees me, I will be all done with chemo and on the road to recovery.  My hair will start growing back in and I will start having more energy.  That is what I am looking forward to.  Returning to my old self.  I don't regret what I am going through but I can't help but hope for better days.  Days where I can look back on this whole journey and smile because I did it.

Received another donation to the walk.  That is wonderful.  This walk is very important to me and raising money to fight Breast Cancer is much more important.  I know God is using me right now and it feels so good to be used by God.  My goal will be met because I believe it will.  Once I am up and on my feet, the fundraising will begin strong.  Breast Cancer needs to be stopped in its tracks and a cure needs to be found.  Too many shameless deaths from it and too many people being diagnosed daily.  I am a prime example of someone who thought I would never get it.  No past medical history, no symptoms, no lump, past good mammograms, and I did self exam each month.  But this year, my mammo came back abnormal and it shocked me.  Early detection is what helped me. That is the key.  Many women over the age of 40 don't even go and get yearly mammo's.  We must do it for our lives.  If I can encourage just one person to get their annual mammo, I would be happy. My voice is going to be heard whenever I speak.  I will preach and preach on mammograms to all that I meet.  My story will not be silent because I want to tell everyone about it.  I want to save as many lives as I can with my story.  Some may not want to know about it but that doesn't matter.  I am here for the ones that want to listen.  Can't please everyone but I can please someone.  Hopefully, that someone that I please will pay it forward and help someone else.  We need a domino effect to win this battle with Breast Cancer. I will spend the rest of my life fighting and helping where I can to find a cure!!