God's Blessings!!

Woke up early Tuesday morning because I had to drink another gallon of that nasty Barium.  Had to go to my CT Scan and get my whole body checked out.  This experience was horrible.  First, I had to drink that white chalky suppose to be berry flavored smoothie.  Then, I had do this CT Scan.  I thought drinking the contrast would be all I would have to do and then just take the x-ray.  NO!! I also had to have an IV with more contrast and I had to drink another 4 ounces of that Barium.  Torture, for sure.  I laid in the circular x-ray machine and waited patiently for the technician to take the x-rays.  She warned me that the IV would make me feel a warm sensation in my hands and bladder area.  Yes, I did and this was the most uncomfortable feeling ever.  However, all this preparation for this x-ray and it actually only took 10 minutes!!  Now, I was going to have to wait for the results.  Results I would get at my oncologist appointment later in the day.

Arrived at the doctor's office that afternoon and as I waited for my name to be called.  I just prayed to God that nothing would appear on that x-ray.  All these tests to find out if there is cancer in one's body are needed.  But having to wait for the results is torture.  I get called back into the doctor's office.  I wait.  My mind keeps thinking about "What if they find something?"  I was trying not to think that way but it is so hard. I am usually a positive person but this cancer is getting the best of me.  The door opens and in walks my doctor.  He smiles and he says hello.  He slowly opens up my medical records and starts reading the CT Scan report.  I try to look over this shoulder and see if I can see anything to be alarmed about.  Unfortunately, at my old age, I wasn't able to eavesdrop over his shoulder because I couldn't read it.  LOL  What seemed like hours but was only about 5 minutes, the doctor finally looked at me.  He said, "Evelyn, the radiologist did not find anything to be alarmed about."  I literally busted out in tears and cried for about 5 minutes.  My doctor hugged me and stated that I was going to alright.  He told me to stop crying but doesn't he understand.  Those tears were tears of joy!!!  I had been so scared waiting for this result, as I had been waiting for the other past results.

Well, my doctor stated that I would only need 4 sessions of chemo.  He felt I did not need a port surgically put into my body.  This is used if a person is having multiple rounds of chemo and makes it easier on that person for the chemo medicines to be administered. They would use an IV on me.  Don't like it but I will do whatever is needed of me to be cancer free.  He gave me my first chemo date.  It will be on July 15th. I am now ready for it to begin because then that is just one more day closer to me not having to have chemo.  I know that the next few months will be difficult but I also believe and know that I will make it.

So I tell everyone my results and the rest of the evening, I am overjoyed and happy that God is allowing the blessings to flow for me in my favor right now.  I love God and I have faith in Him to pull me through.

Wednesday was  a great day!!  Woke up feeling a little sick to my stomach but I had to get up early.  It was Kristina's first day at work at Southwest Airlines.  I wanted to send her off like it was her first day of kindergarten.  LOL  I made her coffee and gave her advice on what to expect the first day. She left the house all smiles and returned home with more smiles. Watching her grow into a young woman is bittersweet.  I would have to say more bitter than sweet.  But she is doing her best to grow up.  I just need to step back and allow her to do it.  Hard to do but something I have to do.

Was feeling a little nauseous most of the day, so I just laid around and rested.  I did have some company later in the evening.  Three of my co-workers/friends, paid me visit and this really made me feel happy. I love visitors and it makes me feel really special to have people come over and check on me.  My co-workers have shown me so much love and I feel so blessed to work with them all.  I am so ready to get back to work and to be around some of the people that I love.

Today, I woke up nauseous again.  I think that my body is trying to rid itself of all those pain pills I was taking.  I have stopped taking them and just trying to take over the counter Motrin.  However, I think weaning myself off of them is putting my body in some type of withdrawal.  Head hurting, stomach queasy and awful diarrhea. Yuck!!  But I have to go through this and try to get my body up to par and to regain some energy.  I return to work July 19th, and I need to be able to do my job.  The pain in my arm is still there but it does get a little better each day.  I see my breast surgeon on July 11th, and I hope he can tell me something to help me understand this pain.  I will see.

On another note, I did get a call from his office this morning and received some more good news.  I was waiting on this last test result. The test is called a BRCA cancer gene test.  This test would let me know if I transmitted a cancer gene to either of my children.  This is something I have worried about for years.  I was more worried now since Kristina is a female and I now had Breast Cancer.  Well, the nurse called and said the the test came back NEGATIVE.  OMG!!! I was elated and filled with so much joy.  It is like all these blessings from God were overwhelming.  But God is like it.  He overwhelms us with blessings daily.  We just sometimes don't see them.  Better believe me, I have been seeing them along my journey.  God is guiding me and holding my hand all the way.  I am very proud to say that I love God and that my faith is very strong.

Each day is different and I see so much.  I see who I can trust.  I see who really cares about me.  I see who I can lean on.  I see a lot of things.  The most important thing that I see is that God hasn't let me down and that through bad times and/or good times, God is constant.  That is what matters to me!!